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Missed News 029A
November 2, 2022
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How to Spend Time on What You Value
November 1, 2022
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We try to use our time wisely—both at work and in leisure—but we often waste it. We may blame work for stripping us of recreation, but when valuable free time comes around, we can often revert back to more work.
What explains the gap between how we use our time and how we want to use our time? A conversation with Harvard Business School professor Ashley Whillans helps us analyze our complex relationship with time and how to orient our time use around what we value.
This episode was produced by Rebecca Rashid and is hosted by Arthur Brooks. Editing by A.C. Valdez and Claudine Ebeid. Fact-check by Ena Alvarado. Engineering by Matthew Simonson.
Be part of How to Build a Happy Life. Write to us at howtopodcast@theatlantic.com. To support this podcast, and get unlimited access to all of The Atlantic’s journalism, become a subscriber.
Music by the Fix (“Saturdays”), Mindme (“Anxiety”), Gregory David (“Under the Tides”), and Yomoti (“Nebula”).
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Getty / The Atlantic
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A therapist says most women have ‘mother hunger’ that affects their relationships — here are 2 signs you have it
November 1, 2022
Business, Food For Thought, Human Interest, Political, Science, Technical amazon, business, Business News, current-events, Future, Hotels, human-rights, medicine, mental-health, research, Science, Science News, technology, Technology News, travel, vacation Leave a comment
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Therapist Kelly McDaniel has spent more than a decade helping her clients overcome grief.
In counseling hundreds of women, she noticed a particular grief many of them experienced that had nothing to do with death. Rather, McDaniel saw women who longed for the love of a mother, even if theirs was still alive.
In 2008, McDaniel coined the term “mother hunger” in her book “Ready to Heal.” She fleshed out the term in her 2021 book “Mother Hunger: How Adult Daughters Can Understand and Heal from Lost Nurturance, Protection, and Guidance” after noticing the phenomenon in so many of her clients.
Mother hunger isn’t a medical diagnosis. Rather, it’s McDaniel’s theory to explain how specific types of childhood neglect lead to attachment injuries, which can impact how a person acts in future relationships.
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Kelly McDaniel is a grief therapist who coined the term “mother hunger” in 2008. Courtesy of Kelly McDaniel
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Missed News 028A
November 1, 2022
Crime, Food For Thought, Human Interest, Medical, missed News, Political, Science, Technical amazon, business, Business News, current-events, Future, Hotels, human-rights, medicine, mental-health, research, Science, Science News, technology, Technology News, travel, vacation Leave a comment
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How to Declutter Your Home When Downsizing
October 31, 2022
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When we talk about “downsizing,” it’s usually referring to the size a person’s home. For example, people may decide to sell their larger family home after their children have grown up and moved out because they simply no longer need that much living space anymore. Others buy or rent a home that initially seemed like the right size for them but later realized that it’s too large.
Whatever the reason for your move, part of the downsizing process involves clearing out stuff you no longer need, and ensuring that everything has a spot in your new place; in other words, some serious decluttering. Here are some strategies that may help.
How to declutter when downsizing
There’s no need to wait until you have solid moving plans to start decluttering. In fact, the sooner you’re able to get it done (or at least begin the process), the better: That way you’ll feel less overwhelmed during the already-stressful experience of packing and moving. (see article)
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Photo: SeventyFour (Shutterstock)
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Envy, the Happiness Killer
October 31, 2022
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In the 13th canto of “Purgatorio” in Dante’s Divine Comedy, the 14th-century Italian poet describes the ultimate punishment of people who in life had fallen prey to envy, one of the seven deadly sins. He shows them perched precariously on the edge of a cliff. Because envy started with what they saw, their eyes are wired shut. To avoid falling, they must support themselves upon one another, something they never did in life. This is a pretty grim punishment—not surprising, perhaps, given that envy is the only sin that is forbidden by not just one of the Ten Commandments in the Catholic tradition, but two.
Perhaps you are less concerned than Dante with punishment in the hereafter. There is plenty of evidence that envy—the resentful longing for what someone else possesses—can give you a little bit of hell or purgatory in the here and now. We all know how envy feels—how it sours our love and desiccates our soul. How it brings out the ugly, spiteful phantasms inside us that take pleasure in the suffering of others for no other reason than that their good fortune makes ours feel insufficient in comparison. As the essayist Joseph Epstein has written, “Of the seven deadly sins, only envy is no fun at all.”
Envy, in short, is a happiness killer. Unfortunately, it is also completely natural, and no one escapes it entirely. But if you understand it better, you can stop fueling it and step back from that cliff’s edge.
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Jan Buchczik
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Missed News 027A
October 31, 2022
Crime, Food For Thought, Human Interest, Medical, missed News, Political, Science, Technical amazon, business, Business News, current-events, Future, Hotels, human-rights, medicine, mental-health, research, Science, Science News, technology, Technology News, travel, vacation Leave a comment
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“What Foods Boost Energy and Improve Sleep?”
October 30, 2022
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A 31-year-old gardener wonders what she should be eating in the day to improve her sleep at night.
A little about me:
Age: 31
Occupation: gardener
Number of hours sleep you get each night: 6 hours
Number of hours sleep you wish you got each night: 8-9 hours
Any officially diagnosed sleep-related problems: no
How much water you drink on average per day: 1 litre (not enough)
How much exercise I do on average per week: 1 cardio workout a week, plus the manual labor of my day-to-day job (see article)
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Lead image design: Ami O’Callaghan; Photos by Getty Images
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The smart way to learn from failure
October 30, 2022
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In today’s motivational literature, failure is often viewed as something to be celebrated. Disappointments are an essential stepping stone to success; a turning point in our life story that will ultimately end in triumph. Rather than falling into despair, we are encouraged to “fail forward”.
If only it were so simple. In the past decade, a wealth of psychological research has shown that most people struggle to handle failure constructively. Instead, we find ways to devalue the task at which we failed, meaning that we may be less motivated to persevere and reach our goal. This phenomenon is known as the “sour-grape effect”. Alternatively, we may simply fail to notice our errors and blithely continue as if nothing has happened, something that prevents us from learning a better strategy to improve our performance in the future.
Inspirational speakers are fond of quoting the words of the novelist Samuel Beckett: “Fail again. Fail better”. But the truth is that most of us fail again and fail the same.
Recent research shows there are ways to avoid these traps. These solutions are often counterintuitive: one of the best ways of learning from your mistakes, for example, is to offer advice to another person who may be encountering similar challenges. By helping others avoid failure, it turns out, you can also enhance your own prospects of success.
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(Image credit: Getty Images)
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Segla Mountain on Senja Island, Norway
October 29, 2022
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Senja (Norwegian) or Sážžá (Northern Sami) is an island in Troms og Finnmark county, Norway, Europe. With an area of 1,586.3 square kilometers (612.5 sq mi), it is the second-largest island in Norway (outside of the Svalbard archipelago). It has a wild, mountainous outer (western) side facing the Atlantic, and a mild and lush inner (eastern) side. The island is located within Senja Municipality, which was established on 1 January 2020. The island of Senja had 7,864 inhabitants as of 1 January 2017. Most of the residents live along the eastern coast of the island, with Silsand being the largest urban area on the island. The fishing village of Gryllefjord on the west coast has a summer-only ferry connection to the nearby island of Andøya: the Andenes–Gryllefjord Ferry.
The island sits northeast of the Vesterålen archipelago, surrounded by the Norwegian Sea to the northwest, the Malangen fjord to the northeast, the Gisundet strait to the east, the Solbergfjorden to the southeast, the Vågsfjorden to the south, and the Andfjorden to the west. Ånderdalen National Park is located in the southern part of the island.
The Old Norse form of the name is believed to have been Senja or perhaps Sændja. The meaning of the name is unknown, but it might be related to the verb sundra, which means to “tear” or “split apart”, possibly because the west coast of the island is torn and split by numerous small fjords. It might also be derived from a Proto-Norse form of the word Sandijōn, meaning “(area) of sand” or “sandy island”.he island of Senja is located along the Troms og Finnmark county coastline with Finnsnes as the closest town. Senja is connected to the mainland by the Gisund Bridge. The municipalities located on Senja are Lenvik (part of which is on the mainland), Berg, Torsken, and Tranøy. Wikipedia
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An image of Segla Mountain on Senja Island, Norway
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