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The case for fewer friends

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After two years of pandemic life, you could find yourself at a fork in the friendship road, choosing between a whittled-down social circle and becoming overextended trying to make up for lost time with everyone on the outer reaches of your network. Amid an ongoing loneliness epidemic, people may feel renewed in their efforts to revive their networks due to the anxiety-inducing realization that their friend group has shrunk to an all-time minimum. Realizing the potential of fostering just a few intimate relationships, however, can be empowering.

Having lots of friends does have benefits: Acquiring a large quantity of friends in your 20s can help inform the quality of friendships you’ll have in your 30s, according to research. “People in their 20s tend to want to build a big roster of friends, because their motive is to expand their sense of identity, and you can do that through different types of people,” says psychologist and friendship expert Marisa Franco, author of the upcoming book Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — and Keep — Friends. People who regularly interacted with 10 or more friends in midlife have higher levels of psychological well-being than those who had fewer than 10, according to a 2012 study. We also know that maintaining friendships leads to positive life satisfaction, minimizes stress, and even contributes to better physical health outcomes.

But you don’t need a roster dozens deep to enjoy the fruits of friendship. Franco says even having one friend is a net positive. “The biggest return we get in friendship is going from zero to one friend in terms of its impact on our mental health and well-being,” Franco says. “If you can get that deep with one person, it’s going to be powerful and it’s going to be impactful, and you don’t need to have a ton of friends.”

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https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/Z_bNxsUTC9Xaw-NVwfeu1GDHAFI=/0x0:3000x1688/1820x1024/filters:focal(1290x663:1770x1143):format(webp)/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/70946704/Untitled_Artwork_200.0.pngIllustration by Shanée Benjamin for Vox

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Click the link below for the article:

https://www.vox.com/23130613/fewer-friends-how-many

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A Creative Solution to ‘the Friendship Desert of Modern Adulthood’

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This week she talks with three women who are part of a group experimenting with “arranged friendship.” Inspired by the arranged marriages common in her home country of Iran, Ari Honarvar brought together a group of relative strangers who decided to commit upfront to be friends through thick and thin. In this interview, they discuss “the friendship desert of modern adulthood” and the oasis that this experiment created for them.

The Friends:

Jessica Harmer, 47, an artist and state-park employee who lives in Oceanside, California
Ari Honarvar, 49, a writer who lives in San Diego
Carolyne Ouya, 30, a nonprofit program developer who lives in San Diego

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

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https://cdn.theatlantic.com/thumbor/D2eiI6C_vcxR7UUTestJf_MRfdE=/0x0:2885x1623/960x540/media/img/mt/2022/03/Tang_Atlantic_ArrangedFriendshipFinal/original.jpgWenjia Tang

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Click the link below for the article:

https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2022/03/arranged-marriage-inspired-friendship/627608/?utm_source=pocket_collection_story

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Missed News 944

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Beautiful Tanzania

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Tanzania, officially the United Republic of Tanzania, is a country in East Africa within the African Great Lakes region. It borders Uganda to the north; Kenya to the northeast; Comoro Islands and the Indian Ocean to the east; Mozambique and Malawi to the south; Zambia to the southwest; and Rwanda, Burundi, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo to the west. Mount Kilimanjaro, Africa’s highest mountain, is in northeastern Tanzania.

Many important hominid fossils have been found in Tanzania, such as 6-million-year-old Pliocene hominid fossils. The genus Australopithecus ranged across Africa between 4 and 2 million years ago, and the oldest remains of the genus Homo are found near Lake Olduvai. Following the rise of Homo erectus 1.8 million years ago, humanity spread all over the Old World, and later in the New World and Australia under the species Homo sapiens. H. sapiens also overtook Africa and absorbed the older species of humanity.

Later in the Stone and Bronze Age, prehistoric migrations into Tanzania included Southern Cushitic speakers who moved south from present-day Ethiopia; Eastern Cushitic people who moved into Tanzania from north of Lake Turkana about 2,000 and 4,000 years ago; and the Southern Nilotes, including the Datoog, who originated from the present-day South Sudan–Ethiopia border region between 2,900 and 2,400 years ago. These movements took place at about the same time as the settlement of the Mashariki Bantu from West Africa in the Lake Victoria and Lake Tanganyika areas. They subsequently migrated across the rest of Tanzania between 2,300 and 1,700 years ago.

German rule began in mainland Tanzania during the late 19th century when Germany formed German East Africa. This was followed by British rule after World War I. The mainland was governed as Tanganyika, with the Zanzibar Archipelago remaining a separate colonial jurisdiction. Following their respective independence in 1961 and 1963, the two entities merged in 1964 to form the United Republic of Tanzania. The countries had joined the British Commonwealth in 1961 and Tanzania is still a member of the Commonwealth as one republic.

The United Nations estimated Tanzania’s population at 63.59 million, which is slightly smaller than South Africa and makes it the second-most populous country located entirely south of the Equator. The population is composed of about 120 ethnic, linguistic, and religious groups. The sovereign state of Tanzania is a presidential constitutional republic and since 1996 its official capital city has been Dodoma where the president’s office, the National Assembly, and all government ministries are located. Dar es Salaam, the former capital, retains most government offices and is the country’s largest city, principal port, and leading commercial center. Tanzania is a de facto one-party state with the democratic socialist Chama Cha Mapinduzi party in power.

Tanzania is mountainous and densely forested in the northeast, where Mount Kilimanjaro is located. Three of Africa’s Great Lakes are partly within Tanzania. To the north and west lie Lake Victoria, Africa’s largest lake, and Lake Tanganyika, the continent’s deepest lake, known for its unique species of fish. To the south lies Lake Malawi. The eastern shore is hot and humid, with the Zanzibar Archipelago just offshore. The Menai Bay Conservation Area is Zanzibar’s largest marine protected area. The Kalambo Falls, located on the Kalambo River at the Zambian border, is the second-highest uninterrupted waterfall in Africa.

Christianity is the largest religion in Tanzania, but there are also substantial Muslim and Animist minorities. Over 100 different languages are spoken in Tanzania, making it the most linguistically diverse country in East Africa. The country does not have a de jure official language, although the national language is Swahili. Swahili is used in parliamentary debate, in the lower courts, and as a medium of instruction in primary school. English is used in foreign trade, in diplomacy, in higher courts, and as a medium of instruction in secondary and higher education; although the Tanzanian government is planning to discontinue English as the primary language of instruction, it will be available as an optional course. Approximately 10% of Tanzanians speak Swahili as a first language, and up to 90% speak it as a second language. Wikipedia

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An image from Beautiful Tanzania

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How to grill plant-based meats for the best texture and flavor

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You’re hosting a cookout, so you make a run to the store. As you tip various ingredients and supplies into your cart, you realize you need a plan for the non-meat eaters. You haven’t really played around with them before, but you grab a couple of packages of plant-based burger meat and links.

The good news is that you don’t have to worry too much about a learning curve after that. “It’s not as dramatic as I thought it would be,” says Dan Zuccarello, executive food editor for cookbooks at America’s Test Kitchen, which recently released “Cooking With Plant-Based Meat.”

That’s one of the main goals for brands such as Impossible Foods, says Laura Kliman, the company’s director of new product development. “We’re trying to replicate the entire sensory and meat-eating experience,” and that includes how the items cook, she says.

Although cooks who are well-versed in grilling traditional meat will find plant-based options pretty similar, there are a few things to keep in mind to make the transition as easy as possible.

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https://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-apps/imrs.php?src=https://arc-anglerfish-washpost-prod-washpost.s3.amazonaws.com/public/XXJPSVWWAAI6ZPQXFBQWJF2MKQ.jpg(Scott Suchman for The Washington Post/food styling by Lisa Cherkasky for The Washington Post)

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https://www.washingtonpost.com/food/2022/05/23/grilling-plant-based-meats-patties-links/?utm_source=pocket_collection_story

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Jealousy Doesn’t Have to Ruin a Friendship

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When Bob Bergeson’s friend invited him to a Denver Nuggets basketball game with some new pals, he was excited to join in. Sure, the evening would cost him nearly $400, an amount he wouldn’t normally spend. But Mr. Bergeson’s splurge didn’t reflect a slavish devotion to basketball; he opened his wallet because he felt insecure about his languishing relationship with his friend, who he perceived to be getting closer to a new group of people.

“He started hanging out with the dads on his daughter’s soccer team and talking about them fondly and I thought, ‘Oh, man he’s kind of got some new friends,’” Mr. Bergeson, 42, a business consultant in Denver, said. “I needed to insert myself to make sure I still mattered to him.”

Just like you can lose a romantic partner to another person, “friends can also lose their slot in the best friend hierarchy,” said Jaimie Krems, a friendship researcher and assistant professor of psychology at Oklahoma State University. This fear of being replaced is often borne out of jealousy, Dr. Krems said. And one way to cope with it, she added, is by doing something social scientists refer to as friend guarding — actions like excessively praising a friend or cutting down a new rival, for example — to maintain a threatened relationship.

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https://static01.nyt.com/images/2022/03/15/well/04well-jealousy-friendships/04well-jealousy-friendships-superJumbo.jpg?quality=75&auto=webpOhni Lisle

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https://www.nytimes.com

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What Makes Smoky, Charred Barbecue Taste so Good? The Chemistry of Cooking Over an Open Flame

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The mere thought of barbecue’s smoky scents and intoxicating flavors is enough to get most mouths watering. Summer is here, and that means it is barbecue season for many people in the U.S.

I am a chemist who studies compounds found in nature, and I am also a lover of food – including barbecue. Cooking on a grill may seem simple, but there is a lot of chemistry that sets barbecue apart from other cooking methods and results in such a delicious experience.

Cooking with fire

First, it is important to define barbecue because the term can mean different things in different cultures or geographic locations. At its most basic, barbecue is the cooking of food over an open flame. What sets barbecue apart from other cooking methods is how heat reaches the food.

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https://pocket-image-cache.com/direct?resize=w2000&url=https%3A%2F%2Fimages.theconversation.com%2Ffiles%2F466829%2Foriginal%2Ffile-20220602-15-5dw0hs.jpg%3Fixlib%3Drb-1.1.0%26rect%3D156%252C260%252C1637%252C1085%26q%3D20%26auto%3Dformat%26w%3D320%26fit%3Dclip%26dpr%3D2%26usm%3D12%26cs%3DstripCooking food over an open flame produces unique flavors thanks to some interesting chemistry. Lars Szatmari / EyeEm via Getty Images

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https://getpocket.com/explore/item/what-makes-smoky-charred-barbecue-taste-so-good-the-chemistry-of-cooking-over-an-open-flame?utm_source=pocket_collection_story

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5 strategies for making friends as a working adult

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How many of us have felt the struggle of making new friends? As the responsibilities of adulthood pile up, we often have little time for socializing and bonding over shared interests.

The past year and a half has only complicated things. With some data showing more than half of workers were given the option to work from home during at least some of the pandemic, personal and professional worlds have blurred. Many of us felt depleted, time-starved, and isolated.

Strong social ties can make all the difference. Long-term studies suggest a clear connection between close relationships and sustained happiness. So, if one of your goals for 2022 is to make more friends, read on.

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https://images.fastcompany.net/image/upload/w_1250,ar_16:9,c_fill,g_auto,f_auto,q_auto,fl_lossy/wp-cms/uploads/2021/12/p-1-6-tips-to-making-friends-as-a-working-adult.webp[Source photo: Ridofranz/iStock]

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https://www.fastcompany.com/90702806/5-strategies-for-making-friends-as-a-working-adult?utm_source=pocket_collection_story

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Ngorongoro Conservation Area

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The Ngorongoro Conservation Area is a protected area and a UNESCO World Heritage Site located in Ngorongoro District, 180 km (110 mi) west of Arusha City in Arusha Region, within the Crater Highlands geological area of northern Tanzania. The area is named after Ngorongoro Crater, a large volcanic caldera within the area. The conservation area is administered by the Ngorongoro Conservation Area Authority, an arm of the Tanzanian government, and its boundaries follow the boundary of the Ngorongoro District in Arusha Region. The western portion of the park abuts the Serengeti National Park (also a UNESCO World Heritage Site), and the area comprising the two parks and Kenya’s Maasai Mara game reserve is home to Great Migration, a massive annual migration of millions of wildebeest, zebras, gazelles, and other animals. The conservation area also contains Olduvai Gorge, one of the most important paleoanthropological sites in the world.

The 2009 Ngorongoro Wildlife Conservation Act placed new restrictions on human settlement and subsistence farming in the Crater, displacing Maasai pastoralists, most of whom had been relocated to Ngorongoro from their ancestral lands to the north when the British colonial government established Serengeti National Park in 1959.

The name of the crater has an onomatopoeic origin; it was named by the Maasai pastoralists after the sound produced by the cowbell (ngoro ngoro). Based on fossil evidence found at the Olduvai Gorge, various hominid species have occupied the area for 3 million years.

Hunter-gatherers were replaced by pastoralists a few thousand years ago. The Mbulu came to the area about 2,000 years ago and were joined by the Datooga around the year 1700. Both groups were driven from the area by the Maasai in the 1800s.

No Europeans are known to have set foot in the Ngorongoro Crater until 1892 when it was visited by Oscar Baumann. Two German brothers (Adolph and Friedrich Siedentopf) farmed in the crater until the outbreak of World War I, after leasing the land from the administration of German East Africa. The brothers regularly organized shooting parties to entertain their German friends. They also attempted to drive the wildebeest herds out of the crater. Wikipedia

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An image from Ngorongoro Conservation Area

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