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People often talk about “red flags” in the world of dating and relationships. These are signs that you and your partner are not compatible, or toxic behaviors and personality traits that you want to avoid. But there’s also such a thing as “pink flags.”
“Pink flags are those things that you notice, that nag at you,” said Tracy Ross, a licensed clinical social worker specializing in couples and family therapy. “Maybe the first or second time you push them away, but after a few times, you begin to pay attention and ask yourself, ‘Is this a flag that could be a deal breaker, or am I imagining it or overreacting, or is this something that can be addressed?’”
Pink flags tend to more subtle and less serious, but they can still pose some risk to a relationship.
“I think it’s important to be mindful of pink flags, or points of anxiety in your relationship, but use them as opportunities to grow together and individually,” said Alysha Jeney, a therapist and owner of Modern Love Counseling in Denver. “Don’t ever dismiss your intuition, but also try to sit with it to be sure you aren’t making assumptions or projecting onto your partner.”
Although pink flags can vary from person to person and relationship to relationship, some occur more frequently than others. Below, Jeney, Ross, and other relationship experts break down 10 examples.
You’ve never had an argument.
“If you’ve never argued before or don’t argue really ever, this can be a ’pink flag,’ because oftentimes it can be an indicator of both parties not being authentic enough in the relationship, and/or willing to be vulnerable enough to truly grow within the relationship,” Jeney said.
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