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London, a 13-year-old girl who lives in suburban Maryland, took a more considered approach to joining social media than many teenagers do. Knowing her mom was skeptical, London put together a presentation making a case for why she should join TikTok, complete with promises such as allowing her mother to review her posts in advance. It worked: On London’s 13th birthday, she joined TikTok.
Since doing so, she has experienced some of the joys of social media — experiences that were not possible in a less networked world. In her living room, London streams popular dance videos onto a TV, and sometimes her mother (a former dancer) and sister (who has nonverbal autism) join her. TikTok also allows London to stay in closer touch with friends.
Yet the downsides of social media are never far away.
London is constantly confronted with images of people who somehow seem prettier, richer, more fashionable, and more popular. Sometimes, she stumbles on truly disturbing videos, like one claiming to show a woman flushing her baby down a toilet.
Above all, social media takes the normal anxieties of teenage life and hypercharges them. When another girl in London’s school stops replying to her messages at night, London ends up crying. When a group of girls gather to get dressed for a dance, they obsess not only over how they look, but how their before-and-after videos will play on TikTok.
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London, 13. Credit… Dee Dwyer for The New York Times
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