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Parents of tweens and teens like me are always in need of a brush up on current slang terms, such as lala bop, and rizz. Now, there’s another term making the rounds in middle and high schools, as well as on TikTok: “crashing out.” 

If you’re unfamiliar with the term, you’re not alone. Here’s your guide to what crashing out means and what to do about it.

What Does ‘Crashing Out’ Mean?

My 14-year-old explained “crashing out” to me as meaning “you’re going to flip out,” or “you can’t pull it together.” A popular TikTok also explains the term as essentially being an overreaction to a minor problem—like having your shoe stepped on. 

We may have called it something else, but kids (and adults!) have been “crashing out” since the beginning of human history. And there’s no denying that emotional regulation is a tough skill for people of all ages to master.

That’s especially true for tweens and teens, who are battling changing hormones, and pressures ranging from school to social media. Teens are also just learning how to navigate tough situations on their own, so “crashing out” happens. 

But sometimes “crashing out” becomes a habit, and a default response to problems big and small. In those cases, experts say it’s important for parents to step in.

Why ‘Crashing Out’ Happens

Many factors can lead to adolescents’ emotions becoming unmanageable—aka “crashing out,” says Kristie Tse, LMHC, a New York-based psychotherapist and founder of Uncover Mental Health Counseling.

“Hormones can amplify emotions, making small issues seem insurmountable,” she tells Parents. “External stressors like academic pressure, social media, and peer relationships exacerbate these challenges.”

Especially when left unaddressed, emotional dysregulation can result.1 But a lot of it also comes down to development.

“The brains and bodies of tweens and teens are in a dynamic state of growth and development, as are their abilities to regulate emotions, make well-thought-out decisions, and manage social, school, family, and personal pressures,” says Tom Milam, MD, MDiv, Chief Medical Officer of Iris Telehealth, Associate Professor of Psychiatry and Behavioral Medicine at the Virginia Tech Carilion School of Medicine, and Attending Psychiatrist at Carilion Clinic.

Sanam Hafeez, PsyD, a New York City-based neuropsychologist and Director of Comprehend the Mind, adds, “Teens go through intense hormonal shifts in impulse control, and the prefrontal cortex—which regulates self-control—is still developing.”

How Parents Can Help Kids Avoid ‘Crashing Out’

Understanding the underlying emotions that cause kids to “crash out” can help prevent outbursts and encourage healthier emotional expression, according to Tse.

Meanwhile, modeling appropriate reactions to stressful situations is one of the most important things parents can do to help kids do the same.

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