Home

Do your boys fight with sticks, Nerf guns and fake swords all the time? Here’s why they do it

Leave a comment

Click the link below the picture

.

As someone who has spent most of his professional life studying how children develop, I’m often asked by parents (especially mums) why children (especially boys) are prone to pick up the nearest stick, pencil, soft toy or even banana and turn them into weapons?

Girls certainly do this too. But research – and parents’ experience – shows you’re more likely to find boys using various objects as swords, guns or grenades to attack one another.

While some parents worry this is too violent, these actions do not mean you are raising a burgeoning psychopath. Rather, they are significant components of healthy development.

Playful aggression

Role playing is a key part of children’s play, when they pretend to be someone or something else. They can do this on their own or with others.

When they do it with others it is called “sociodramatic play”. This type of play teaches children both verbal and social skills while they interact with others.

Play fighting is one form of sociodramatic play. It can include rough and tumble play, chasing one another around, superhero play, wrestling and mock fighting. Psychologists call this “playful aggression”.

This kind of play is not about hurting anybody. Rather, it provides opportunities for children to explore their world with a sense of empowerment and control (because they set the rules) and to build relationships as they negotiate the play.

How does it work?

Imagine children are playing a battle with pillow forts and cardboard swords. This is not just a question of whose fort topples first. The game will require them to read facial expressions, express themselves and develop an awareness of power dynamics (or what researchers call “relationships hierarchies”).

Relationship hierarchies are complex, but focus on power and who is in charge. During episodes of playful aggression, this might mean taking control, giving in to someone else’s idea, or sharing power. These hierarchies allow children to make decisions about who they want to play with, who to avoid, or how to adapt their behavior to create friendships.

So relationship hierarchies play an important role in emotional and social development. They teach children how to get along with one another, how to make and play within a rule structure, and how to recognize the difference between playful and harmful behavior.

For example, other children’s reactions during the game will teach them that yelling and jumping may be considered fun. But rough pushing or deliberately breaking rules – such as turning into a killer dragon when everyone else has agreed to be tigers – is not OK and will make your friends unhappy.

Why do we see this more in boys?

You might be wondering why such behaviors seem to be more evident in boys than girls. Research shows boys (on the whole) tend to be more physical in how they play.

Their play often focuses on themes related to power and dominance and playful aggression is the perfect way to experiment with these themes.

Theories about sex differences in social play extend across many research areas including psychology, neurobiology, evolutionary psychology and anthropology. Current theories link these differences to testosterone and differences in neurochemistry.

There is some evidence to suggest boys and girls are socialized differently in relation to being physical.

However, the degree of influence is contestable, given sex differences in behavior appear very early in life and in other mammals. Perhaps the socialization process exacerbates nature – and as such, nature and nurture may be working in tandem.

The end result is still the same, with more boys than girls engaging in playful aggression.

When girls role play, it tends to focus on what researchers call “tend and befriend” or on people and nurturing. For example, games built around families or looking after pets.

But this is not to say girls can’t be aggressive. However, research suggests if girls fight, it is usually done with words to hurt someone’s feelings and children are upset with each other. It is not done for fun.

Perhaps this is why playful aggression can be difficult for some mothers to understand and appreciate.

But there is no link between playful aggression in children and being aggressive as an adult.

.

https://images.theconversation.com/files/618351/original/file-20240910-16-aultvq.jpg?ixlib=rb-4.1.0&rect=0%2C485%2C3988%2C1994&q=45&auto=format&w=1356&h=668&fit=crop

Lipatova Maryna/Shutterstock , CC BY

.

.

Click the link below for the article:

https://theconversation.com/do-your-boys-fight-with-sticks-nerf-guns-and-fake-swords-all-the-time-heres-why-they-do-it-237976?utm_source=pocket_discover_parenting

.

__________________________________________

Leave a comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

TradingClubsMan

Algotrader at TRADINGCLUBS.COM

Comedy FESTIVAL

Film and Writing Festival for Comedy. Showcasing best of comedy short films at the FEEDBACK Film Festival. Plus, showcasing best of comedy novels, short stories, poems, screenplays (TV, short, feature) at the festival performed by professional actors.

Bonnywood Manor

Peace. Tranquility. Insanity.

Warum ich Rad fahre

Take a ride on the wild side

Madame-Radio

Découvre des musiques prometteuses dans la sphère musicale française (principalement, mais pas que...).

Ir de Compras Online

No tiene que Ser una Pesadilla.

Kana's Chronicles

Life in Kana-text (er... CONtext)

Cross-Border Currents

Tracking money, power, and meaning across borders.

Jam Writes

Where feelings meet metaphors and make questionable choices.

emotionalpeace

Finding hope and peace through writing, art, photography, and faith in Jesus.

Wearing Two Gowns.COM

MOVING FORWARD...That's how WINNING is done!”-Rocky Balboa

...

love each other like you're the lyric to their music

Luca nel laboratorio di Dexter

Comprendere il mondo per cambiarlo.

Tales from a Mid-Lifer

Mid-Life Ponderings

Hunza

Travel,Tourism, precious story "Now in hundreds of languages for you."

freedomdailywriting

I speak the honest truth. I share my honest opinions. I share my thoughts. A platform to grow and get surprised.

The Green Stars Project

User-generated ratings for ethical consumerism

Cherryl's Blog

Travel and Lifestyle Blog

Sogni e poesie di una donna qualunque

Questo è un piccolo angolo di poesie, canzoni, immagini, video che raccontano le nostre emozioni

My Awesome Blog

“Log your journey to success.” “Where goals turn into progress.”

pierobarbato.com

scrivo per dare forma ai silenzi e anima alle storie che il mondo dimentica.

Thinkbigwithbukonla

“Dream deeper. Believe bolder. Live transformed.”

Vichar Darshanam

Vichar, Motivation, Kadwi Baat ( विचार दर्शनम्)

Komfort bad heizung

Traum zur Realität

Chic Bites and Flights

Savor. Style. See the world.

ومضات في تطوير الذات

معا نحو النجاح

Broker True Ratings

Best Forex Broker Ratings & Reviews

Blog by ThE NoThInG DrOnEs

art, writing and music by James McFarlane and other musicians

fauxcroft

living life in conscious reality

Srikanth’s poetry

Freelance poetry writing

JupiterPlanet

Peace 🕊️ | Spiritual 🌠 | 📚 Non-fiction | Motivation🔥 | Self-Love💕

Sehnsuchtsbummler

Reiseberichte & Naturfotografie

Spotlight Choices

astrology - life coaching - optimistic reality

INFINITE ENERGY

"قوتك تبدأ من هنا"

Mesime ÜNALMIŞ

Her çocuk hikayelerle büyümeli

Treasurable Life: The Dirty, Divine Truth of Becoming

No shame. No filters. Just everything we were told to hide.

Dr. Edward McInnis

Doctor of Medicine

Ishaya Zephaniah

Explore the dynamic relationship between faith and science, where curiosity meets belief. Join us in fostering dialogue, inspiring discovery, and celebrating the profound connections that enrich our understanding of existence.

Through Pain Suffering , Mental Health , Addictions , Cancer , Death , Drs

Living with Purpose: Finding Meaning Amidst Life's Challenges